Famous Father Questions the Word ‘Miscarriage’

How A Post to Mourn Loss Was Used to Challenge a Common Term for Pregnancy Loss

In recent years, more and more people are coming forward and being open with the public about experiencing pregnancy loss. With the one in four statistic about pregnancies not coming to term, it is likely you or someone close to you has experienced pregnancy loss.

As with any type of grief, however, the reactions from the experience are so personal that it’s difficult to champion one specific opinion or stance on the topic. However, we wanted to share what husband, father of five, and actor, James Van Der Beek, who many of us know from Dawson’s Creek, realized after his wife’s pregnancy loss last year.

In a social media post that later spread virally for its message, Van Der Beek revealed they’d experienced three losses over the years. This experience led him to realized how wrong the word ‘miscarriage’ is, and the baggage it’s definition carries, and shared his take on the implications using the word can have on the women who experience loss:

“Wanted to say a thing or two about miscarriages … First off — we need a new word for it. ‘Mis-carriage,’ in an insidious way, suggests fault for the mother — as if she dropped something, or failed to ‘carry.’ From what I’ve learned, in all but the most obvious, extreme cases, it has nothing to do with anything the mother did or didn’t do. So let’s wipe all blame off the table before we even start.”

He ends his post calling for a new name to replace ‘miscarriage’ — and we can’t help but appreciate hearing this perspective from both a father, and a person who suffered and mourned pregnancy loss as a parent.

What are your thoughts? Does miscarriage need a new name? What are some other ways to do away with the implications of fault or failure in the word?